Some of These Movie Blurbs Are Funny. Some Are Not.

But you've got to read 'em all to know which are which.

By Keith Harris

6:11 PM CDT on May 12, 2022

Publicity stills.|

Two complicated men: Short Round and Shaft.

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I'm billing the Film Society for my carpal tunnel surgery.

Special Screenings This Week

Thursday, May 12

Abba: The Movie (1978)
Alamo Drafthouse
From what I gather, this is a movie about Abba. $12.50. 7:05 p.m. Also Saturday 3 p.m. More info here.

Let the Little Light Shine (2022)
Capri Theater
A high-achieving public school in a Black neighborhood of Chicago fights off interference from the city. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:30 p.m. Also Saturday 11:10 a.m. More info here.

Shaft (1971)
Capri Theater
Shaft at the Capri. Can you dig it? Part of MSPIFF. $5. 7 p.m. More info here.

In the Heat of the Night (1967)
The Heights
Sidney Poitier is a Philly cop who heads down to Mississippi to teach Rod Steiger a few things about detectiving and race. $12. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

Alegría (2021)
The Main
A Spanish woman revisits her Jewish roots when she hosts her niece’s wedding. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:30 p.m. Also Sunday 11:20 p.m. More info here.

Neighbours (2021)
The Main
An antisemitic new teacher arrives in a Syrian border town. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:40 p.m. Also Sunday 11:15 a.m. More info here.

Sweet Disaster (2021)
The Main
A pregnant woman has a plan to win her boyfriend back. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:45 p.m. More info here.

As Far As I Can Walk (2021)
The Main
A modernized reinterpretation of a Serbian epic with Ghanaian refugees recast as the heroes. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:50 p.m. More info here.

Trenches (2021)
The Main
A look at the lives of Ukrainian soldiers in Dombas, where fighting with Russia began in 2014. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2 p.m. Also Wednesday 9:15 p.m. More info here.

Both Sides of the Blade (2022)
The Main
Both sides? In this economy? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:15 p.m. More info here.

The Judgement (2021)
The MainA Dutch journalist fights the powers that be to learn the truth about a murder. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:20 p.m. Also Saturday 1:30 p.m. More info here.

My Old School (2022)
The Main
For this documentary about a Scottish schoolboy whose past seems, well, exaggerated, Alan Cumming lip syncs the lad’s own words. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

One Second (2020)
The Main
In Zhang Yimou’s latest, a Chinese man escapes a labor camp during the Cultural Revolution. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:40 p.m. Also Saturday, 4:20 p.m. More info here.

Exposure (2022)
The Main
An all-woman team voyages to the North Pole. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:45 p.m. More info here.

Move Me (2021)
The Main
A quadriplegic Minneapolis dancer learns to create and move again after an injury. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. Also Wednesday 4 p.m. More info here.

Wildhood (2021)
The Main
A Two Spirit teen searches for his mom. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:05 p.m. More info here.

Hit the Road (2021)
The Main
Panah Panahi, son of the great director Jafar Panahi, debuts with this story of an Iranian family’s cross country road trip, Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. More info here.

Elektra, My Love (2021)
The Main
An experimental production of Sophocles is staged in the ruins of Beirut’s Piccadilly Theater. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. Also Friday 1:45 p.m. More info here.

Drunken Birds (2021)
The Main
A Mexican drug cartel work falls for his boss’s wife and follows her to Canada. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:20 p.m. Also Tuesday 4:30 p.m. at the Landmark Center. More info here.

Apples (2020)
The Main
A man must reconstruct his life after a global pandemic (again?!) causes mass amnesia. Part of MSPIFF $8-$15. 9:15 p.m. More info here.

Anonymous Club (2021)
The Main
A very intimate 16 mm look at rocker Courtney Barnett’s private life. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:30 p.m. More info here.

Dos Estaciones (2022)
The Main
A family-owned distillery in Mexico struggles to keep pace with the times. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:35 p.m. Also Tuesday 4:20 p.m. More info here.

Flux Gourmet (2022)
The Main
“Performance artists work night and day as ‘sonic caterers,’ extracting disturbing noises from food.” Hmm… good gross or bad gross? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:45 p.m. More info here.

Millie Lies Low (2021)
The Main
Ashamed of missing her big flight to NYC, a New Zealand woman fakes a big adventure on social media. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:40 p.m. Also Saturday 9:40 p.m. More info here.

Face/Off (1997)
Parkway Theater
Cage. Travolta. Woo. Let’s fucking goooooo. With pre-show spelling bee. $9/$12. 8 p.m. More info here.

Friday, May 13

Friday the 13th Part IV: The Final Chapter (1984)
Alamo Drafthouse
I’m not a big believer in coincidences, but the timing here is uncanny. $10. 7 p.m. More info here.

Leadbelly (1976)
Landmark Center
Gordon Parks on the take of the great blues singer. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. Also Saturday 1:30 p.m. at The Main. More info here.

Maria Chapdelaine (2021)
The Main
A poor Canadian girl must choose between three suitors. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:30 p.m. Also Tuesday 1:30 p.m. More info here.

Commitment Hasan (2021)
The Main
An Anatolian farmer must confront his past as he plans for his pilgrimage to Mecca. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:40 p.m. More info here.

Exposing Muybridge (2021)
The Main
A look at the man who set the stage for moving pictures—and got away with murder. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:50 p.m. More info here.

Midwives (2022)
The Main
Two midwives from different religious backgrounds work together in conflict-riven Myanmar. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2 p.m. More info here.

As in Heaven (2021)
The Main
A teen girl in rural 1800s Denmark strives to be the first in her family to go to school. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:20 p.m. Also Tuesday 1:50 p.m. More info here.

Hinterland (2021)
The Main
A disillusioned former cop searches for a murderer in 1920s Vienna. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Riotsville U.S.A. (2022)
The Main
An archival look at a town the U.S. built in the ’60s to train riot police. 4:40 p.m. Also Monday 2:10 p.m. More info here.

Valiant! A Car, a Cause, and the Cold War (2022)
The Main
My first car was a Dodge Dart, very similar to the Plymouth Valiant. And that was during the Cold War. So I can relate. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:45 p.m. More info here.

The Box (2021)
The Main
An orphan in rural Mexico is recruited to a life of crime. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:50 p.m. Also Wednesday 4:45 p.m. More info here.

Resurrection (2022)
The Main
When Tim Roth reenters Rebecca Hall’s life, things go psycho. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. Also Saturday 9:30 p.m. More info here.

We Feed People (2022)
The Main
Chef José Andrés thinks he can feed the world. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. More info here.

The Pez Outlaw (2022)
The Main
In the ’90s, when Pez dispensers are hot commodities, one man makes a killing smuggling them from eastern Europe to the U.S. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. Also Saturday 1:40 p.m. More info here.

Emily the Criminal (2022)
The Main
A debt-addled Aubrey Plaza learns that she is surprisingly good at lawbreaking. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. Also Tuesday 7 p.m. More info here.

Hard Shell, Soft Shell (2021)
The Main
A French oyster farmer’s marriage proposal goes awry. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:20 p.m. More info here.

Saloum (2021)
The Main
A gang of West African mercenaries carrying a stash of stolen gold hide out in a weird resort town after their plane crashes, resulting in “84 minutes of pure African genre mayhem.” Hell yeah. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:30 p.m. Also Wednesday 9:45 p.m. More info here.

Camila Comes Out Tonight (2021)
The Main
A rebellious girl’s coming of age story in Buenos Aires. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:35 p.m. Also Wednesday 1:30 p.m. More info here.

Whether the Weather Is Fine (2021)
The Main
Love a good titular homonym. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:40 p.m. More info here.

Sirens (2022)
The Main
A documentary about the Middle East’s first all-female thrash metal band. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:45 p.m. Also Wednesday 7 p.m. More info here.

Watcher (2022)
The Main
An American actress is being stalked in Bucharest… or is she? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:50 p.m. Also Wednesday 9:40 p.m. More info here.

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984)
Parkway Theater
The movie that sparked a change in the rating system, so that tweens would never again be exposed to Kate Capshaw’s acting without parental supervision. $5-$10. 1 p.m. More info here.

Mothra vs. Godzilla (1964)
Trylon
A giant moth is all that’s standing between Tokyo and you know who. $8. 7 p.m. Also Saturday 9 p.m and Sunday 3 p.m. More info here.

Ghidora, the Three-Headed Monster (1964)
Trylon
Godzilla, Mothra, and Rodan take on one head each. $8. 9 p.m. Also Saturday 7 p.m. and Sunday 5 p.m. More info here.

Saturday, May 14

Crazy Rich Asians (2018)
Alamo Drafthouse
Where the Michelle Yeohaissance began. $10. 11:45 a.m. More info here.

Nextwave Shorts Program
Capri Theater
A selection of short films from high school students worldwide. Part of MSPIFF. Free. Noon. More info here.

Mija (2022)
Landmark Center
A portrait of a young singer hoping to visit her family in Mexico. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. Noon. Also Wednesday 9:20 p.m. at The Main. More info here.

Juniper (2021)
Landmark Center
A depressed boy unexpectedly bonds with his grandmother. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 3 p.m. More info here.

Romy’s Salon (2019)
The Main
A 10-year-old finds herself caring for her grandmother—and her salon. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 11:15 a.m. Also Monday 1:45 p.m. More info here.

Murina (2021)
The Main
The arrival of a family friend stirs up tensions between a Croatian teen and here dad. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 11:20 a.m. Also Tuesday 4:45. More info here.

Karmalink (2021)
The Main
In futuristic Cambodia, a boy believes his dreams are memories of his past lives. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 11:30 a.m. More info here.

Zátopek (2021)
The Main
A biopic of Emil Zátopek, the great Czechoslovakian Olympian. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:45 p.m. Also Wednesday 1:15 p.m. More info here.

Spaceboy (2020)
The Main
A Belgian boy thinks he can travel to space in a DIY ship. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:50 p.m. More info here.

Drowning in Silence (2022)
The Main
After her son drowns in a neighbor’s pool, a documentary filmmaker learns how common such accidents are, and tries to find out what can be done. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:15 p.m. Also Sunday 4:30 p.m. More info here.

The Strangest Girl in the World (2021)
The Main
A young artist’s illustrations start to come to life. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

The Pact (2021)
The Main
Aging author Karen Blixen promises a young poet literary fame if he obeys her completely. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:40 p.m. Also Monday 4:10 p.m. More info here.

A Love Song (2021)
The Main
A woman waits at a campground for an old lover to return. Lotta ways that can go. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:45 p.m. Also Tuesday 4:40 p.m. More info here.

Crows Are White (2022)
The Main
A podcast-voiced guy gets shut out by some Buddhist monks, but finds a friend. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 6:45 p.m. Also Sunday 2:30 p.m. More info here.

Lost Illusions (2021)
The Main
That big ol’ 2 ½ hour Balzac adaptation you ordered is ici, monsieur. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 6:50 p.m. Also Wednesday 6:45 p.m. More info here.

Costa Brava, Lebanon (2021)
The Main
A new landfill changes life in rural Lebanon. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. More info here.

Cha Cha Real Smooth (2022)
The Main
Party starter Cooper Raiff makes friends with Dakota Johnson and her daughter. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. Also Wednesday 7:15 p.m. More info here.

Small Body (2021)
The Main
In early 20th century Italy, a rural woman tries to get her dead infant resurrected so it can be baptized. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:30 p.m. Also Tuesday 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Neptune Frost (2021)
The Main
An intersex hacker battles for the future of Rwanda is Saul Williams’ very high-concept sci-fi movie. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15 p.m. 9:45 p.m. More info here.

Magnetic Beats (2021)
The Main
Two brothers in ’80s Europe fall for electronic dance music—and the same girl. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:50 p.m. Also Monday 7 p.m. at the Landmark Center. More info here.

Piggy (2022)
The Main
An abused and ridiculed butcher’s daughter befriends a kidnapper for horrific fun. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:55 p.m. More info here.

Sunday, May 15

Rear Window (1954)
Alamo Drafthouse
I can’t sum it up any better than this tweet does. $10. 3 p.m. More info here.

Free Renty: Lanier v. Harvard (2021)
Capri Theater
A Black woman successfully sues Harvard for images of her ancestors that had once been used to “prove” white supremacy. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4 p.m. Also Wednesday 2 p.m. at the Main. More info here.

Jasmine Is a Star (2022)
Capri Theater
A Minneapolis teen with albinism wants to become a supermodel. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. More info here.

Dear Future Children (2021)
Landmark Center
A documentary look at three young activists from different countries. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. Noon. More info here.

The Emigrants (2021)
Landmark Center
A reimagining of the classic story of Swedes coming to America, told from the wife’s perspective. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2 p.m. More info here.

Any Day Now (2021)
The Main
An Iranian teen refugee adjusts to life in Finland. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 11 a.m. Also Wednesday 1:45 p.m. More info here.

Mama Bears (2022)
The Main
Evangelical moms defend their LGBTQ+ children. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 11:30 a.m. More info here.

The Long Breakup (2020)
The Main
A Ukrainian expatriate’s look at the long history of turmoil in her homeland. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. Noon. More info here.

Experimental Curator: The Sally Dixon Story (2021)
The Main
The story of the pioneering experimental film champion Sally Dixon, who helmed Film in the Cities and worked with the Walker. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1 p.m. Also Monday, 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Shorts Program 7: Words Matter
The Main
Not silent films then, I’m guessing. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:45 p.m. More info here.

Good Boss (2021)
The Main
There’s no such thing. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2 p.m. More info here.

Buladó (2021)
The Main
A teen girl in the Caribbean is caught between cultures. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2:10 p.m. Also Wednesday 4:30 at the Capri Theater. More info here.

Film in the Cities: Radical Roots in Youth Media (2022)
The Main
A documentary about a groundbreaking youth film program in the ’70s. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 3 p.m. More info here.

Shorts Program 9: MN Portraits
The Main
A look at some intriguing locals. $8-$15. 4:45 p.m. More info here.

Benediction (2021)
The Main
Terence Davies’s biopic explores the life of WWI poet Siegfried Sassoon. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 5 p.m. More info here.

Everything Went Fine (2021)
The Main
The latest from François Ozon adapts the autobiographical novel of his longtime collaborator, Emmanuèle Bernheim, played here by Sophie Marceau. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 5:15 p.m. More info here.

Long Flat Balls 3 (2022)
The Main
Balls? Can they say that?!?! Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 5 p.m. More info here.

Children of the Mist (2021)
The Main
A Vietnamese girl is torn between the modern ideas she’s taught in school and the traditional values of her family. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. Also Tuesday 2 p.m. More info here.

Gabby Giffords Won’t Back Down (2022)
The Main
A look at the life and career of Arizona Congresswoman Gabby Giffords since her horrific 2011 shooting. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

The Replacement (2021)
The Main
Not a music biopic. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:45 p.m. More info here.

Lo Invisible (2021)
The Main
A woman suffering from postpartum depression feels trapped. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:50 p.m. More info here.

The Tale of King Crab (2021)
The Main
A 19th century Italian exile turns treasure hunter. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:50 p.m. More info here.

One Sings, the Other Doesn’t (1977)
Trylon
Agnès Varda’s wonderful and perceptive story of how feminism evolves and weaves in and out of the lives of two friends. $8. 7 p.m. Also Monday-Tuesday 7 & 9:15 p.m. More info here.

Monday, May 16

Moulin Rouge! (2001)
The Heights
You’ll be not just entertained, but somehow reborn. $12. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

Sinkhole (2021)
The Main
The titular pitfall threatens a Korean family’s new home. Oh no! Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:40 p.m. More info here.

Carajita (2021)
The Main
The relationship between a wealthy girl and her nanny is more strained than it seems. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:50 p.m. More info here.

107 Mothers (2021)
The Main
That’s just too many mothers, imo. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2 p.m. More info here.

Leave No Traces (2021)
The Main
A story of state brutality in ’80s Poland. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4 p.m. Also Wednesday 3:45 p.m. More info here.

Persian Lessons (2020)
The Main
In occupied France, a Jewish man convinces the Nazis that he’s actually Persian. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:15 p.m. More info here.

Tantura (2022)
The Main
Was there a military massacre in 1948 covered up by the Israeli government? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:40 p.m. More info here.

The Story of Film: A New Generation (2021)
The Main
Mark Cousins follows his previous visual essay, The Story of Film: An Odyssey, into the 20th century. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. More info here.

Let It Be Morning (2021)
The Main
A satirical look at the status of Palestinians in Israel. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. More info here.

Mission: Joy - Finding Happiness in Troubled Times (2021)
The Main
A documentary exploring the friendship between Archbishop Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. More info here.

Beautiful Minds (2022)
The Main
A funeral director and a grocery delivery man take a road trip in a hearse. Could they possibly learn a little about themselves and each other? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:20 p.m. Also Wednesday 1:40. More info here.

Shorts Program 8: Rainbow Lights
The Main
LGBTQ+ short films. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

Tuesday, May 17

Greener Pastures (2021)
Landmark Center
An Israeli widower grows weed for the fellow residents of his nursing home. Aged hilarity ensues. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7 p.m. More info here.

Back Then (2021)
The Main
A comic, nostalgic look back at family life in… ’80s Poland? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 1:45 p.m. More info here.

The First Death of Joana (2021)
The Main
A Brazilian teen investigates her family secrets. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 2:10 p.m. More info here.

Bad Axe (2022)
The Main
Can a Cambodian refugee husband and Mexican-American wife run a restaurant in rural Michigan? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:15 p.m. More info here.

To the End (2022)
The Main
A look at the young people fighting for the Green New Deal. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. More info here.

The Gravedigger’s Wife (2021)
The Main
How can a Somali gravedigger pay for his wife’s kidney treatment? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:15 p.m. More info here.

Three Minutes: A Lengthening (2021)
The Main
A filmmaker analyzes a short loop of 1938 family home movie to learn more about the lives of Holocaust victims. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:20 p.m. More info here.

Everybody Hates Johan (2022)
The Main
That’s not nice. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

Wednesday, May 18

Inland Empire (2006)
The Heights
Your last chance to see it locally. (Ain’t ya glad I didn’t use the scary picture again?) $12. 7 p.m. More info here.

Broken Keys (2020)
The Main
A Syrian musician must sell his piano so he can escape ISIS. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:20 p.m. More info here.

Tigre Gente (2021)
The Main
A tense documentary about how jaguar teeth are illegally smuggled from South America into China. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Boycott (2021)
The Main
Thirty-three states have passed anti-boycott legislation. This doc looks at some of the people who’ve been caught up in these laws. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 6:30 p.m. More info here.

Utama (2022)
The Main
Climate change threatens the livelihood of a Bolivian family. Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 7:10 p.m. More info here.

Kendra and Beth (2022)
The Main
They’re opposites. Will they attract? Part of MSPIFF. $8-$15. 9:30 p.m. More info here.

Cherry Falls (2000)
Trylon
With a serial murderer killing all the virgins, there’s only one way to be safe: Fuck party! $5. 7 p.m. More info here.