Welcome back to The Flyover, your daily digest of important, overlooked, and/or interesting Minnesota news stories.
Triggered Snowflakes Melt Down Over Pizza Parlor Misunderstanding
Typically, a saga this achingly stupid would be relegated to the grievance swamp known as Alpha News. But, since it has snowballed into a full-blown mainstream news cycle, let's talk about the Davanni's worker who was allegedly rude to a room full of guys wearing MAGA hats.
To keep it mercifully brief: After their annual convention, members of the Senate District 50 Republican Party met Saturday inside a party room at an Edina Davanni's, where an employee reportedly told them "political organizing" isn't allowed at the restaurant. Rather than brush the misunderstanding off like magnanimous adults whose political project is now dominating the country, they brayed like tender babies to anyone who'd listen, first via Twitter and then via Fox 9. The incident (term used so very lightly) "made me feel we were being discriminated against on the basis of who we support politically," purported grownup AK Kamara, a local delegate to the Republican National Convention, tells Fox 9.
Our dutiful media treated Pizzagate (that's an original term, right?) like an honest-to-god news story, which pressured Davanni's to issue a corporate apology late Sunday. "Over the weekend, our team in Edina misunderstood a policy around fundraising efforts in our party rooms which resulted in an incident that impacted valued guests," the company wrote. "We're deeply sorry for the actions taken."
If you're guessing this non-story activated the online ranks of fish-hoisting, ballcap-wearing culture warriors, you guessed right! "How come these 'misunderstandings' and 'mistakes' always go one way?" whined one Facebook user, whose likely political party has seized almost every lever of power while its followers still trip over themselves to act like victims.
We'll give the final word to 'CCO radio guy Jason DeRusha, whose mentions are a mess over tweeting, "Honestly - blowing up a locally owned business for one employee at one store screwing up is dare I say, snowflake behavior. How about trying to work it out offline first and then going public? Give me a break."
Rep. Finke's Grim New Life at the Capitol
What's it like being Minnesota's first openly transgender lawmaker amid the current culture of relentless and widespread trans bullying? Not great! That's the main takeaway from this excellent Minnesota Reformer story by Michelle Griffith, which focuses on how Rep. Leigh Finke (DFL-St. Paul) is navigating a workplace where roughly half of her colleagues want her to be miserable. "The attacks on Finke are at times deeply personal," Griffith writes while describing fellow lawmakers, like dipshit Rep. Drew Roach (R-Farmington), who gleefully misgender and insult her.
It appears Republicans pushed Finke out of the House Public Safety Finance and Policy Committee during negotiations on a recent power-sharing agreement. (They claim she "instigated" protestors disrupting a committee meeting earlier this year; she denies the allegations.) Elsewhere, House Republicans are using their temporary majority to ram through a raft of anti-trans legislation, including bills that: ban trans women from girls sports teams; ban trans inmates from the state's only women prison; and make the “castration or sterilization of minors” a felony. We must ask: How is this down-punching stuff helping the prices of eggs, health care, and homes in which to store those eggs for your constituents?
“The atmosphere is much more deflated [at the Capitol], much more difficult. The mood feels different," Finke tells the Reformer.
Twin Got Themselves a Hot-Shot Knuckleballer
That's the word outta Fort Myers, Florida, where 24-year-old Twins pitcher Cory Lewis has earned the "filthiest" pitch award, according to a poll conducted by seven of the team's catchers. Lewis, who excelled as a starter for Class AA Wichita last year, is reportedly a nasty knuckleballer, that ultra-rare style of MLB pitcher who throws the goofiest of stuff.
“It feels like someone is throwing a ball at you and then someone is shaking you really hard,” teammate Patrick Winkel tells the Strib, adding that one of those pitches smacked him square in the catcher's mask. “You have no idea what it’s going to do. You can’t really get on someone for not catching it because it’s like, ‘Well, why don’t you get back there and try?’”
Incredible. Lewis's knuckleball isn't just baffling—it's fast as hell. The righty's speediest knuckleball (84.8 mph) during this spring's Grapefruit League was the fastest such pitch of the pitch-tracking era, which dates back to 2008, MLB.com reports. Here's The Athletic's Aaron Gleeman, who ranked Lewis as the 10th best prospect in the Twins farm system.
Lewis looks the part of a flame-thrower with a sturdy 6-5 frame, but his fastball tops out at 92-93 mph. Instead, what makes him unique is a mid-80s knuckleball folded into an otherwise traditional five-pitch mix. Views of his upside vary from mid-rotation starter to fringe arm, but Lewis has already surpassed expectations and could begin 2025 one step from the majors.
RIP to 2 Locally Angled Rock Dudes
Over the weekend New York Dolls frontman David Johansen and Badfinger guitarist Joey Molland both died, thus further fortifying heaven's already-outrageous band. But down here on Earth, far below the clouds that form into a kickass stage where immortal angel rockers shred majestic, our focus must turn to matters more provincial: Minnesota connections.
For Molland, that's an easy task; the British axman, who died of diabetes complications at 77, married a Hopkins woman and lived in the Twin Cities for 40 years. “His work ethic was so strong," Molland's son, Joey, tells the Strib. "I’ll carry that with me. It’s a story of victory through tough times and coming out with his head up. He was positive, an optimist.”
For Johansen, who died of various health woes at 75, the local angle is more tenuous, but that has never stopped a Minnesota journalist, and guess what? It won't stop me. As Jim Walsh outlined in abundant detail for MinnPost in 2017, the New York Dolls performance at the 1974 Minnesota State Fair's so-called Teen Tent, obstinately indoctrinating the first generation of Minnesota punks. "I was impressed that the Dolls were such poor players," remembers Suicide Commandos guitarist Chris Osgood, who many consider to be the godfather of local punk rock. "I had never seen a band that had a major label deal that was so sloppy and instrumentally at the 7th grade level. It was revelatory to me that they were so bad musically and so great philosophically. I said to myself, 'Hmm …'"
Take us out, boys!
