Let's get this straight up front: There are going to be so many screenings of Elf, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, and other Christmas flicks this month that I cannot possibly make new jokes whenever they show. So please just laugh at the old jokes. You know, like you do when you go see those movies.
Thursday, November 30
Welcome to the Dollhouse (1995)
Grandview 1&2
You know where you are? You're in the dollhouse, baby. You're gonna DIE! $12. 9:15 p.m. Saturday 11:59 p.m. More info here.
White Christmas (1954)
The Heights
White Christmas is showing nine times at The Heights this week. This is the only screening that isn't sold out. Yet. Through Thursday. $20. 7:30 p.m. More info here.
My Last Best Friend (2023)
Trylon
Two men with the same name meet in 2020 New York. One of them is Eric Roberts. $14. 7 p.m. More info here.
Friday, December 1
Scream It Off Screen
Parkway
This seems to sell out in advance every month now. Totally deserved success. $13/$19. 8 p.m. More info here.
Junk Head (2017)
Trylon
"A triumph of stop-motion grotesquery," the Trylon website says. And it sure looks that way. $8. 7 & 9:15 p.m. Sunday 3 & 5:15 p.m. More info here.
2023 British Arrows Awards
Walker Art Center
Once more, these "adverts," as the Brits say, will take over the Walker for December, and tix will go fast. All month. $18+. Times and more info here.
Saturday, December 2
The Polar Express (2004)
Alamo Drafthouse/The Parkway
I have, in the past, called this a "freaky-looking movie," but upon reconsideration I am upgrading that to "creepy-looking movie." Alamo: $15.04. 3:40 p.m. More info here. Parkway: $5-$10. 1 p.m. More info here.
From the Met: The Magic Flute
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16
You want a magic flute? I got one for you right here. $27.26. 12:55 p.m. More info here.
Spirited Away (2001)
The Main
You know how sometimes you love a movie so much you don't even know what to say about it? $5-$10. 12 p.m. Monday 7 p.m. More info here.
Princess Mononoke (1997)
The Main
The brutal, beautiful Miyazaki tale of environmental devastation and struggle. $5-$10. 3 p.m. More info here.
Silent Night Deadly Night 2 (1987)
The Main
Oh, it's garbage day all right. $10. 10 p.m. More info here.
The Mad Genius of Scott Carson
Trylon
Screenings of the late actor's two films Citizen ‘Caine and The Tiki War. $5. 4 p.m. More info here.
Sunday, December 3
Little Women (2019)
Alamo Drafthouse
Just how small are they? $10. 11 a.m. More info here.
Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16/Emagine Willow Creek
Boris Karloff cartoon or GTFO. $16.26. 1 & 7 p.m. Also Wednesday. More info here.
Elf (2003)
Emagine Willow Creek
Hide your cats! Everyone's favorite visitor from Melmac is back and—oh, sorry, it's Elf. Also Wednesday. $9. 1 & 6 p.m. More info here.
Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984)
The Main
This world may have its flaws, but we sure do get a lot of chances to see Miyazaki films on the big screen these days. $5-$10. 12 p.m. More info here.
Castle in the Sky (1986)
The Main
Pirates! Government agents! A magic crystal! Prime early Miyazaki here. $5-$10. 3 p.m. More info here.
To Live and Die in L.A. (1985)
Trylon
William Peterson must stop Willem Dafoe's evil counterfeiter! $8. 7:30 p.m. Monday-Tuesday 7 & 9:15 p.m. More info here.
Monday, December 4
The Holiday (2006)
Alamo Drafthouse
I got an email today from one of those awful "research" firms that are alway spamming us, and it said this is the second-most popular holiday movie, based on Google searches, and I know that's hardly science, but still, really? $10. 6:45 p.m. More info here.
To All A Goodnight (1980)
Emagine Willow Creek
Uh oh, it's a serial killer Santa. $6. 7:30 p.m. More info here.
Tuesday, December 5
Elf (2003)
Alamo Drafthouse
The third most Google-searched holiday movie, per that "report" cited above. $15.04. 6:30 p.m. More info here.
Max Lucado's Because of Bethlehem (2023)
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16/B&B Theaters Bloomington 13
Because of Bethlehem sounds like a romcom title. Also Wednesday. $16.35. 7 p.m. More info here.
Freshwater Presents—Upriver: A Watershed Film (2023)
The Main
A look at a conservation movement at Oregon’s Willamette River system. Free. 7 p.m. More info here.
Handyman From Hell (2023)
The Parkway
He seems helpful—but he's evil! $15-$35. 7:30 p.m. More info here.
Wednesday, December 6
Deep Red (1975)
Alamo Drafthouse
It's a Dario Argento Xmas! $10. 9:10 p.m. More info here.
Hateful Eight (2015)
Grandview 1&2
Am I correct in remembering this as a meandering, mean-spirited piece of trash? $12. 9:15 p.m. More info here.
The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)
Lagoon Cinema
If you absolutely need to see a Barry Keoghan movie this week. $5. 7 p.m. More info here.
Elf (2003)
The Parkway
Three times in one week. What are the odds? $9/$12. Costume contest at 7:30 p.m. Movie at 8 p.m. More info here.
Her (2013)
Showplace ICON
If I recall correctly, Joaquin Phoenix plays a weirdo loner in this one. $7. 7 p.m. More info here.
Tape Freaks December
Trylon
Who knows what analog surprises the Freaks have in store for us this week? $5. 7 p.m. More info here.
Opening This Week
Follow the links for showtimes.
Animal
A son avenges his father.
Godzilla Minus One
Nobody told me there was gonna be math.
Renaissance: A Film by Beyoncé
A gift from the queen to her loyal poors.
Silent Night
John Woo is back. But is he back?
The Shift
Some guy gets sent to a parallel dimension or something.
Ongoing in Local Theaters
Follow the links for showtimes.
The Holdovers (read our review here)
The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes
Killers of the Flower Moon (read our review here)
Priscilla (read our review here)
Saltburn (read our review here)
Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour (read our review here)
