We all have hidden fantasies, allures, and curiosities that deserve to be unearthed and unpacked. This new column, Land o’ Lusts, is a love letter to the bohemian underbelly of the Twin Cities. In each installment, writer Melodie KG—a Minneapolis-based consultant, nonprofit leader, and adult industry professional—will seek to dispel myths, uphold truths, and inspire conversations that reduce stigma for local sex workers, erotic professionals, risqué artists, and other deviants. Let’s connect to our stories. Let’s talk about the things we’re not supposed to in the pursuit of our collective liberation. Welcome to Land o’ Lusts.
Have an idea for a story or profile? Interested in being interviewed? Have a (hopefully not literally) burning sex question? Reach out to me at contact@melodie-kg.com.
You’re probably already familiar with the big, unsexy local philanthropists: The Bush Foundation, which administers the annual Bush Prize; the Headwaters Foundation for Justice, which invests in community development and equity; the Target Foundation, the philanthropic arm of every Midwestern mom’s favorite department store.
We have churches with their various ministries, and groups like Community Aid Network that provide resources to neighbors in need. But the average Minnesotan might be surprised to learn that there’s a thriving countercultural underbelly of kinksters, fetishists, sex workers, dominatrixes, burlesque dancers, and drag queens who are also helping to save our city.
We see their booths on display at Twin Cities Pride, where they sell sexy leather harnesses, spanking paddles, and novelty adult toys. But all year round, these folks are engaging in ministry, mutual aid, and service for the betterment of the communities they live and play in. Through community organizing, direct services, and charitable donations to important causes, the kinky weirdos are actively involved in giving back to the community and making moves to save our city.
We kinksters (and yes, I mean “we”) are diverse by all measures and reside in and around the Twin Cities. We are cashiers, teachers, writers, mechanics, librarians, and waiters, often hiding in plain sight. We are integral members of the community and we participate in humanitarian efforts, criminal justice reform, charitable donations, and providing mutual aid where services and programs are lacking. And we are giving back.
Earlier this summer, a themed monthly kink and BDSM celebration called Kinky Friday caught my attention. Founded nine years ago by Mistress Jean Bardour, the event is currently organized by dominatrices QueenPea and Señora LaRosa (known as internationally acclaimed burlesque performers SweetPea and Phoenix de la Rosa), both of whom have a long history of giving back to the community while providing titillating adult entertainment.
Their event draws a monthly crowd of 200 to 300 people to Gay 90’s and has a rotating fetish theme—and they’re so fun to partake in. Kinky Friday’s mission is to create a safe and sexy environment where folks can be seen and celebrated for their kinks, to foster a spirit of inclusion and respect for marginalized folks, and to encourage mobilization of privilege and pay it forward one pervert at a time (#pervypayingitforward).
“We have worked to cultivate an event that exemplifies the diversity within kink and to broaden the perspectives, to those who are... curious,” says Señora de la Rosa, who’s worked at Kinky Friday for six years now. She adds that Kinky Friday has “deep roots” in the community, and that includes the event’s charitable efforts.
To date, KinkyFriday has given over $20,000 to local causes—every month there’s a new benefactor from the show’s proceeds. Prior benefactors have included Express Bike Shop, MN POC LGBTQ+ Pride, Appetite for Change, Helping Paws, Kids in Need, Southside Harm Reduction.
“As it’s evolved, so has its mission. The largest part about Kinky Friday is that it’s a community-run event. Every person comes from a different facet of sex work and they all have diverse backgrounds,” Señora adds.
Some of this community-focused work is centered around sex workers specifically. For example: Did you know that, until 2006, it was illegal for any person to “dance in the streets” in Minneapolis? In protest of this sentiment, and in the spirit of passing stripper-affirming laws, some local sex workers decided to host Dancing in the Streets, a parade that celebrated its fourth year this June, on International Whore’s Day. Dancing in the Streets (or DITS for short) starts downtown at Sex World and ends at Father Hennepin Park.
DiTS started as a campaign celebrating the passing of the Adult Entertainment Ordinance in Minneapolis, which enabled workplace protections for strippers. Andi Snow, Executive Director of SWOP-Minneapolis, is at the center of it all.
“DiTS is not just a parade, it’s an action,” Snow says. She describes their work in policy advocacy and outreach as “held together by slutmagic and tenacity.”
When asked about her activist origin story, she says with a grin, “I brought my high school polycule to fight Nazis with glitter bombs, and the rest is history.” Today, as an out sex worker, now sits on the grantmaking committee for the Women’s Foundation of Minnesota.
SWOP-Minneapolis and the Stripper’s Guild provide public education, street outreach, and mutual-aid services in Minneapolis. This often looks like weekly pink wagon-filled trips to Peavey Park and E. Lake St., where street-based individuals are visible, including sex workers, drug users, and people experiencing homelessness. SWOP will hand out cold weather gear in the winter, water and snacks in the summer, and safe injection supplies year-round in partnership with other community care projects, such as Southside Harm Reduction Services.
Every summer, the much-loved local BDSM gear shop Bondesque throws their annual party, RubberBall USA, a fetish-wear only celebration with a mission of bringing together fetishists and performers for a night of community fun. The event is typically housed at the Historic Concord Exchange in St. Paul, and kinky weirdos come from across the Midwest to celebrate the occasion.
The event is one of the biggest annual fetish events in North America, and the main party on Saturday night is always packed with stage performances by global fetish superstars, an artful runway fashion show, and a cadre of doms and dominatrixes offering their unique specialties. There’s also a raffle, with thousands of dollars in prizes.
In 2024, RubberBall USA’s raffle proceeds went to an organization called National Coalition on Sexual Freedom, a nonprofit organization that advocates for consenting adults in the kink and non-monogamy lifestyles by fighting discrimination and persecution through direct services.
This year at RubberBall, ya girl bought five raffle tickets and won a whole Bag of Dildos from Bondesque, the estimated value of which was over $500. I don’t know about you, but this was the community philanthropy I needed.
