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Hi, DNR? Where Can I Find Some Beaver Meat to Eat?

From licensing complaints to existential quandaries, this Twitter account purports to transcribe the odd calls that the Minnesota DNR receives.

10:55 AM CDT on September 23, 2021

Dinner?

|Photo by mana5280 on Unsplash

The Minnesota Department of Natural Resources gets questions.

Anyone who’s ever worked a customer service job knows how wide-ranging the queries you get can be. So you can just imagine the questions that the DNR’s St. Paul Call Center must field.

But thanks to a Twitter account apparently run by some DNR employees, you don’t have to imagine them. You can read ’em.

Since July 2019, an account called “Alt-DNR Info Center” (@dnrAlt) has been tweeting out what it calls “actual questions from the public asked of the MN DNR Information Center.” The account name is a nod to the various “alt” posters that sprouted on social media during the Trump years, claiming to be rogue agency employees resisting their wicked bosses. But @dnrAlt doesn’t seem to be run by agency moles—just folks who want to document the curious interactions they have with the public. 

(We reached out to the account but haven’t heard back yet, so we can't confirm how actually "actual" these questions are. I doubt a fake account would get as mundane as “There is a hunter hunting on my property and I didn’t give him permission.” But if they did prank us, we’re... well, I guess we’re gonna be mad.)

The tweets cover a wide range of topics. Some callers have very specific needs.

Some have overarching frustrations with bureaucracy.

Some offer intriguing and mysterious information.

Some have questions seemingly beyond the scope of the MN DNR.

And some—well, some seem to be looking back on their lives, wondering why things didn’t turn out differently, and turning desperately to the DNR for help. 

The only frustrating aspect of @dnrAlt is that you get the questions but no answers. So you’ll have to figure out where to find beaver meat—or if your father never really loved you—on your own. Or you could just call the DNR.

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