You Will (Not) Be Surprised by How Many Xmas Movies Are in Theaters Right Now

Pretty much every movie you can see in theaters this week.

By Keith Harris

12:06 PM CST on December 8, 2022

Photos provided|

All the Beauty and the Bloodshed; A Muppet Christmas Carol

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Whole lotta seasonal movies out there, friends. Be careful or you just might catch the Christmas spirit.

Special Screenings This Week

Thursday, December 8

Evangelion:3.0+1.01 Thrice Upon a Time (2021)
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16
The Evangelion saga continues, as all anime sagas must. $16.13. 7 p.m. Also Sunday 4 p.m. More info here.

Smyrna (2021)
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16
A historical drama about the 1922 burning of the city of Smyrna, Greece. $16.13. 7 p.m. More info here.

The Godfather (1972)
Grandview 1 & 2
Saw a trailer for this at the Grandview last week and a very loud man declared “Now that’s a good movie” authoritatively. $12. 9:15 p.m. Also Saturday 11:59 p.m. More info here.

The Bishop’s Wife (1947)
The Heights
Cary Grant plays an angel. $12. 7:30 p.m. More info here.

Judy’s Thoughts (2022)
The Main
A short film about a mother’s last thoughts, recorded while dying of cancer. Followed by a discussion with the filmmaker, MPR’s Cathy Wurzer, and a grief counselor. $15. 7 p.m. More info here.

Bad Santa (2003)
Parkway Theater
What’s Billy Bob Thornton up to these days? With pre-movie Worst Santa Costume Contest. $9/$12. Contest at 7 p.m. Movie at 8 p.m. More info here.

Battle for Pandora (2022)
Trylon
Haha. you can’t copyright the name of planet, James Cameron. $8. 1 p.m. More info here.

Jingle All the Way (1996)/Totes Recall Live Podcast Recording
Trylon
If you go to this screening of the Minnesota-filmed Xmas romp (followed by a podcast on the flick), make sure to re-read our in-depth oral history first so you’re prepared. $11/$13. 7 p.m. More info here.

British Arrows Awards
Walker Art Center
It’s that time of year! Most screenings are already sold out, so if you’re interested, hop to it. $15. Thursday-Sunday. Showtimes and more info here.

Friday, December 9

A Christmas Story (1983)
Riverview
Meet a midwestern family that’s actually reluctant to buy their child a weapon. $4. Through Wednesday. Showtimes vary. More time here.

Elf (2003)
Riverview
Hide your cats! Everyone’s favorite visitor from Melmac is back and—oh, sorry, it’s Elf. $4. Through Wednesday. Showtimes vary. More info here.

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation (1989)
Riverview
Starring America’s two most beloved actors, Chevy Chase and Randy Quaid. $4. Through Wednesday. Showtimes vary. More info here.

White Christmas (1954)
Riverview
Bing Crosby! Danny Kaye! Rosemary Clooney! Vera-Allen! Christmas! Vermont! $4. Through Wednesday. Showtimes vary. More info here.

It Happened One Night (1934)
Trylon
Eighty-eight damn years old and still funny as hell. $8. Friday-Saturday 7 & 9 p.m. Sunday 3 & 5 p.m. More info here.

Saturday, December 10

A Christmas Story (1983)
Alamo Drafthouse
You know the drill—one joke per movie per week. $10. 6:30 p.m. More info here.

Christmas in Connecticut (1946)
Alamo Drafthouse
Barbara Stanwyck is a famous food writer who must hide the fact that she can’t cook. $10. 12:25 p.m. More info here.

The Met: Live in HD: The Hours
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16/Emagine Willow Creek
Turns out they made an opera about that book about Mrs. Dalloway. $26.50. 11:55 p.m. Also Wednesday. More info here.

Dr. Seuss' The Grinch (2018)
Emagine WIllow Creek
Oh jeez, I forgot they made another Grinch. Karloff or GTFO. $8.45. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Gremlins (1984)
Emagine Willow Creek
You had one job, Billy! $10.75. 7 p.m. More info here.

Sunday, December 11

Little Women (2019)
Alamo Drafthouse
Just how small are they? $10. 12:15 p.m. More info here.

Elf (2003)
Alamo Drafthouse
Look, at this point just assume if you wanna see Elf in the next few weeks, you can. $15. 3:45 p.m. More info here.

Girls Will Be Girls (2003)
Emagine Willow Creek
Three actresses (all played by men) try to sort out their careers. $10.75. 7 p.m. More info here.

Scrooge (1970)
Emagine Willow Creek
Albert Finney sings! $8.45. 4:40 & 7:30 p.m. Also Wednesday. More info here.

A Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)
Parkway Theater
Wait a minute—Michael Caine isn’t a muppet. Or is he? $5-$10. 1 p.m. More info here.

Three Colors: White (1994)
Trylon
Julie Delpy, at her meanest and French-est, divorces her Polish husband and he’s forced out of the country. $8. 7:15 p.m. Also Monday-Tuesday 7 & 9 p.m. More info here.

Monday, December 12

Tokyo Godfathers (2003)
Alamo Drafthouse
Tokyo Godfathers is a Christmas movie. $10. 6:30 p.m. More info here.

5,000 Blankets (2022)
AMC Rosedale 14/AMC Southdale 16
That’s too many blankets. $16.13. 7 p.m. Also Tuesday. More info here.

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2010)
Emagine Willow Creek
Finnish kids discover the tomb of an evil Santa. $10. 6:25 p.m. More info here.

Elf (2003)
Emagine Willow Creek
Never heard of it.Through Wednesday. $7. 4:30 p.m. More info here.

Edward Scissorhands (1990)
The Heights
Apparently Tim Burton didn’t want Tom Cruise for the role because the actor wanted to know how Edward peed. A valid concern, imo! $12. 7:30 p.m. More info here.