There’s just something special about walking to your neighborhood park with a travel mug of wine, laying out a blanket for you and your friends, and letting the mosquitos eat you alive while you watch a movie you could stream for free at home. No, really. It’s a grand old time.
Summer is mere months away, which means Minneapolis Parks & Rec has live entertainment planned once again, barring any new news about coronavirus variants. In the style of our film and music guy, Keith Harris, we present to you their pretty great summer 2022 movie schedule.
Mmmm. Delicious rat food. 9:45 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
This is a horse girl movie!! 9:45 p.m. Audubon Park, 1320 NE 29th Ave., Minneapolis
Back to the Future
This is your chance to see the most normal role of Crispin Glover’s career. 7-11 p.m. Armatage Park, 2500 W. 57th St., Minneapolis
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
Remember when Harry Potter movies didn’t suck and we didn’t know that J.K. Rowling sucks? 9:45 p.m. Lake Harriet Bandshell, 4135 W. Lake Harriet Pkwy, Minneapolis.
Fun fact: In the ‘80s lots of middle-aged women thought Peter Falk was sexy. 9:45 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Emma Stone IS Cruella DeVille. 9:45 p.m. 36 Avenue North and Victory Memorial Drive, Robbinsdale.
Hear the song that finally took down “Let It Go.” Thank god. 8:30-10:30 p.m. Bossen Field Park, 5701 S. 28th Ave., Minneapolis
Our movie guy Keith Harris hated this flick. 9:45 p.m. Lyndale Farmstead, 3900 S. Bryant Ave., Minneapolis.
Horses!!! 9:45 p.m. Pearl Park, 414 E. Diamond Lake Rd., Minneapolis.
School Of Rock
Jack Black at his sweetest. 9:45 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Spider-Man No Way Home
Have you seen this movie yet? Well, now is your chance. 8:30-10:30 p.m. Lyndale Farmstead Park, 3900 Bryant Ave. S., Minneapolis
This movie is not good guys. Bring extra wine. 8:30-10 p.m. Fuller Park, 4800 Grand Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Glitter emo vampires who believe in abstinence until marriage. 9:45 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Sports! 9:45 p.m. Powderhorn Park, 3348 14th Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Huh! Apparently this is a Pixar movie that came out in 2021. 9:45 p.m. Franklin Steele Park, 1600 Portland Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Fuck “Let It Goooo.” 9:30 p.m. Lynnhurst Park, 1345 W. Minnehaha Pkwy, Minneapolis.
Animals can’t sing! 9:30 p.m. Harrison Park, 503 N. Irving Ave., Minneapolis.
Crazy Rich Asians
Rich people always be crazy. 9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
The Wedding Singer
Remember when Adam Sandler movies weren’t the worst? 9:30 p.m. Mueller Park, 2509 S. Colfax Ave., Minneapolis.
Will Smith, before the slap. 9:30 p.m. Lake Harriet Bandshell, 4135 W. Lake Harriet Pkwy, Minneapolis.
The Mitchells vs the Machines
Huh. This is a Sony movie, not Pixar? 9:45 p.m. Lyndale Park Gardens, 1300 W. 42nd St., Minneapolis.
The mad scientist who made this dude knows nothing about anatomy. 9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Enter a world where the Rock is a cruise guide… 9:30 p.m. Sibley Park, 1900 E. 40th St., Minneapolis.
Come early for ice cream social and inflatables for kids, stay for the cheesy football movie. 6:30-9 p.m. Hiawatha School Park, 4305 E. 42nd St., Minneapolis.
Mel Brooks’s classic 1974 homage to the Golden Age monster movies starring Gene Wilder, Peter Boyle, and Madeline Kahn. 7:30-11 p.m. Lake Nokomis Community Center, 2401 E. Minnehaha Parkway, Minneapolis.
Field of Dreams
“If you build it, they will come”—the Ghosts of Capitalism. 9:30 p.m. Northeast Park, 1530 NE Johnson St., Minneapolis.
What if animals hosted American Idol? 7-11:15 p.m. Waite Park, 1810 34th Ave. NE, Minneapolis
Women in science, before Barbie said “math is hard!” 9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Clifford The Big Red Dog
For the love of God, please pick up after your dog. 9:30 p.m. 36 Avenue North and Victory Memorial Drive, Robbinsdale.
Again! 9:30 p.m. Corcoran Park, 3334 S. 20th Ave., Minneapolis.
The Bad Guys
9:30 p.m. Lake Harriet Bandshell, 4135 W. Lake Harriet Pkwy, Minneapolis.
Clifford the Big Red Dog
Please don’t go on my lawn. 9:30 p.m. Bottineau Park, 2000 NE Second St., Minneapolis.
…Again! 9:30 p.m. Pershing Park, 3523 W. 48th St., Minneapolis.
Fun fact: Danai Gurira went to Macalester College. 9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Raya and the Last Dragon
Dragons! 9:30 p.m. 3030 E. 53rd St., Minneapolis.
Addams Family 2
This is the one where Christina Ricci goes full Daria. 8:30-11 p.m. Folwell Park, 1615 N. Dowling Ave., Minneapolis.
7:30-11:30 p.m. Elliot Park, 1000 E. 14th St., Minneapolis.
Jumanji – The Next Level
Sometimes you have to deal with a Mario Bros. 2 to get to a Mario Bros. 3. 8:30-10 p.m. Longfellow Park, 3435 36th Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Boss Baby 2: Family Business
Boss babe. 9:30 p.m. Matthews Park, 2318 29th Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets
Snape kills Dumbledore. But not yet. 9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Still singin’. 8:15-10:15 p.m. Lake Hiawatha Park, 2701 E. 44th St., Minneapolis.
Bend It Like Beckham
Fun fact: This movie is 75% queerbaiting. 9:30 p.m. Painter Park, 620 W. 34th St., Minneapolis.
Space Jam – A New Legend
This is more of a lesser told, deep-cut legend. 8:30-11 p.m. Bohanon Park, 4917 Bryant Ave. N., Minneapolis.
Spider-Man: No Way Home
Wow, you still haven’t seen this movie? 9:15 p.m. Beltrami Park, 1111 NE Summer St., Minneapolis.
In the Heights
Lin-Manuel Miranda before Hamilton. 9:15 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Wallace & Gromit The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
This movie is freakin’ cuuuuute. 9:15 p.m. Loring Park, 1382 Willow St. S., Minneapolis.
Peter Rabbit 2: The Run Away
Food allergies are no joke, kiddos. 9:15 p.m. North Commons, 1801 N. James Ave., Minneapolis.
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings
Wait, this is a Marvel movie? 9:15 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Isle of Dogs
Wes Anderson does his thing. 9:15 p.m. North Mississippi Park, 5116 N. Mississippi Dr., Minneapolis.
Chaos made it through the toddler years. 9:30 p.m. McRae Park, 906 E. 47th St., Minneapolis.
9:30 p.m. Keewaydin Park, 3030 E. 53rd St., Minneapolis.
Harold and Maude
A suicidal teen gets it on with an older lady. 9:30 p.m. Loring Park, 1382 Willow St. S., Minneapolis.
9:30 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis, MN 55415-1699, United States
9:30 p.m. Logan Park, 690 NE 13th Ave., Minneapolis.
9-11:30 p.m. Luxton Park, 112 Williams Ave. SE, Minneapolis
The Addams Family 2
9:15 p.m. Morris Park, 5531 39th Ave. S., Minneapolis.
9:15 p.m. Cleveland Park, 3232 Russell Ave. N., Minneapolis.
West Side Story
Read our review here. 9 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis.
Glenn Close IS Cruella DeVille. 9:15 p.m. Powderhorn Park, 3400 15th Ave. S., Minneapolis.
Even Russian spies have family drama. 9:15 p.m. Van Cleve Park, 901 15th Ave. SE, Minneapolis.
9:15 p.m. MLK Park, 4055 Nicollet Ave. S., Minneapolis.
In the Heights
9:15 p.m. Whittier Park, 425 W. 26th St., Minneapolis.
The Greatest Showman
Fun fact: The guy who inspired this movie, P.T. Barnum, was a human trafficker. 9:15 p.m. The Commons, 425 Portland Ave., Minneapolis, MN 55415-1699, United States
The Biggest Little Farm
Watch a farm movie ON A FARM!! 9:15 p.m. JD Rivers Children’s’ Garden, 2900 Glenwood Ave., Minneapolis.
PAW Patrol the Movie
I don’t know why you would watch this movie unless you’re 4 and you already know what this is. 7-11 p.m. Kenny Park, 1328 W. 58th St., Minneapolis.
Spider-Man: No Way Home
You still haven’t seen it yet? Well, here you go. 9 p.m. 3100 S. Bryant Ave., Minneapolis.